Tag Archives: silverfox

detour into disappointment

You know how when you like a guy for like five days and he winds up being married?

Story of my life.

I had this huge raging crush for about a week. He was a customer at my store who works at the restaurant chain across the way. I will name his Restaurant Guy and I will forever feel like a moron walking into that restaurant.

He was so absolutely cute and always seemed excited to see me. We started doing that thing where we hang out at the counter too long and talk too long and the whole getting him his order thing took too long…

Then yesterday he tells me he has a son.

Of course.

One thing I have come to realize over the past two years is that I’m hardcore into dads. Yes that’s right, older guys, fathers, men who have little mini-thems walking around.

Even without knowing that they are fathers I’m attracted to them. It’s only months or weeks, or in this case days, that I come to find out that indeed they do have offspring.

With Silverfox he was old enough to where one almost had to assume he had children. Restaurant Guy however, is my age and gave off no particular dad-signals. I think my liking him in general should have been a dad-signal.

I feel like an idiot mostly because I came back. What I mean is that I got home from work tonight around 8:40pm, and I drove back. Back to the restaurant that he works at, back to see him because I had only seen him briefly earlier when he had been in my store, back because I wanted to talk to him more.

I came in and sat down at the bar at, talking to another person I know who works there, who said uh yeah I think “(real name of Restaurant Guy)” is married.”

How quickly can you down a beer and pretend someone is waiting for you outside?

6 minutes.

What makes me feel gross and icky is that minutes before his coworker told me he was married, he had come by the bar and seemed ecstatic to see me! He even said he would be back soon to talk to me.

You can come talk to my empty beer glass. Deuces.

But on a separate note that is separate from me unknowingly being hung up on a married family man for a week, why am I so into dads but yet hate kids so much?

now that were at the alter…. i’m too old for you

Not sure how sad or pathetic this is…

Or whether single ladies across the Atlantic are all simultaneously blogging about this at the same time I am and its actually completely normal..

But poor Edith right?

I do not even pretend to care for her character, but yet somehow I was able to completely connect with her finally as she is sobbing into her sheets, hair askew, and full of bitterness.

I mean she got left at the alter. Shit.

She even tried to convince her bridegroom that his age was not a big deal to her while they are standing at the alter. That is like a brides worst nightmare, that she should stand there in her veil telling her groom the reasons why they should marry. Have that damn stuff figured out before you get there!

I suppose this all struck me a little more than it normally would because I’m currently infatuated with a man who is about twenty years older then me. He is my hunky “Silverfox” because he has gray hair and well, he’s a fox!

We are not actually dating, though I can tell we are attracted to one another. A couple of people have told me that he will NEVER ask me out because I’m just too young. Usually I want to hit those people but today I might agree with them.

Because my silverfox is not like Edith’s fiance. He feels that I’m too young so he refuses to get too involved with me or cross certain boundaries where as Edith’s fiance couldn’t be a man and tell her “No”.

I suppose I am lucky? Lucky that my silverfox and I haven’t gone out on a date for I would probably want a second, and a third, and so on and be ever so blissfully head over heels while he wallows in guilt and wants to dump me because he feels he is stealing my youth.

But being in Edith’s or my position, what do you do you do when you no longer have your caring older guy? Obviously men your own age haven’t been working for you. Do you just go after other older men? That probably isn’t the answer either.

Well anyhow, here’s to us all not getting left at the alter aye?

Cheers.