well, I deserve that

Karma is a real thing people, and occasionally it goes around in the span of less than 24 hours.

I like it better when you receive karma years later, you almost don’t remember it’s karma and you think to yourself for days, why would this happen to ME? I’m such a delightful person.

It’s a week later when you remember oh yeah, I’ve done shit.

At least you get that week or so to feel wronged and act like you’re the victim of a terrible person without a soul.

Karma took me down this weekend.

Friday night I went to a particular bar to hang out with a guy that I have a mild flirtation with. When I say mild I mean that I thought he was kinda cute and that was about it.

We’ve flirted and gotten drunk at this bar together, and I even drunk texted him less than two weeks ago. If there were ever a guy to label a “back-up guy” this would be him.

I had told him awhile back that someone dumped me and I don’t want anything serious, basically so I could carry on this flirtation and have fun with him when I attend this bar. And then not have to be moving toward anything serious with him.

This particular Friday night was the night before my friends wedding. I knew my ex was going to be present at the wedding and that him and I were definitely going to be close to, if not the only single people there.

I decided I needed a hook up that night, that would be fun enough to distract me the following day. Back up guy told me he would be at the bar and I thought perfect, this will be just what I need. Some good memories to indulge in while I sit there at the ceremony the next day, and maybe we could even text during the reception and say flirty and inappropriate things while my ex sits across the table from me.

So yes my goal was to use this person to feel better about myself at a wedding.

What I did not see coming was me suddenly having a rush of attraction for back up guy that I can’t even blame on being drunk, because I wasn’t. I think I want to blame it on the wedding. Knowing I had to be at a wedding the next day gave me feelings? I’m sure there is some theory in psychology I could use to blame this phenomenon on.

Whatever it was it came hard. Ten minutes into being there I broke the touch barrier, twenty minutes in we were arms around, smiling. I stayed at the bar until it closed that night. Lots of cuddles and kisses and smiles and laughter, he drove me home around 2:00am, where we had a fabulous make out session until almost 3:00am.

We kissed goodbye and said we would text the next day, only he didn’t.

Before I was even at the wedding I started to have this nervous panic because he hadn’t texted me back. I knew he wasn’t big on sleeping in, I knew he was up. Wtf.

All the self doubts started coming along, things had went well hadn’t they? He seemed about as stoked to be there with me as I was with him.

Oh my god two days ago I didn’t even like him.

When he did text back: “I woke up late”
When I told him I was out of the wedding: “Nice”
When I asked him what his plans were: “Hanging out with Tessa”

Well I don’t know who the fuck Tessa is but thank you for making it clear how very uninterested you are.

I didn’t respond back at all and unfortunately had to hang out with married friends that night as well as the ex, because people had been in town for the wedding and wanted to get together.

Mercifully a friend had brought their unfinished flask left over from the wedding, which still did not save me from discussions about all of our friends weddings, the wedding that took place today, and where everyone is buying the best clothes for their husbands.

When I finally returned home around 11:30, back up guy texted me that he was at the bar.

Well now I feel like a booty call.


Like being the second to only single girl at that wedding hadn’t made me feel icky enough, now this guy who I always got the vibe liked me more than I liked him, is telling me he is hanging out with other girls while the sun is still out and then texting me close to midnight.

Some of this I felt I deserved because I had gone to meet him that night only to use him as a self esteem boost.

If I had known that it was going to be super cuddly and adorable and then pure nothing the next day I would have probably tried to find that self esteem boost at a different bar…..

Or maybe I should try to be a better person that oh I don’t know, doesn’t use people.

Well regardless, Karma was delivered (awfully speedily) and I have now received my just desserts.

Now if I could pretty please have alcohol.


2 thoughts on “well, I deserve that

  1. All Adventurous Women Do

    I actually don’t think that him not being all over you with Texts the next day is such a bad sign. He might not have wanted to appear overly keen/ crazy. Lots of people just play it cool at first. Also did you tell him you were going to a wedding? He probably didn’t want to bother you. I find it’s normally around the evening of the day after/ the day after the day after that they get very text-y. Also you don’t know who “Tessa” is. She’s probably not another girlfriend, unless he’s crazy telling the girl he slept with that he is now hanging out with his girlfriend. Maybe they are just friends.


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