excuse me as I mumble something and run away from you

Every once in awhile I think about why I’m still single. I’ll be cleaning dishes and thinking damn, I’m a decent human being….why don’t I have a boyfriend?

Yesterday I was reminded why. I ran from a man.

Just a random man? No in fact one of my customers that I’ve been infatuated with for almost a year now. We bumped into each other on a street corner as I was headed to work, and he was heading to my work for coffee.

I knew that if this ever happened I would do something dumb. Obviously.
As he greets me I’m just staring, I might have nodded once but I don’t actually remember.
Because I don’t remember anything he said. AT ALL. I don’t even know what I was doing during our “conversation”” or what I was thinking at the time, though if I had to guess I’d guess panic.

I do so happen to remember how it ended…because I ran.
Now don’t get upset, I wasn’t just standing there nodding (hopefully?) and then bolted. No I managed to mumble very quickly “I’ll see you at work okay?” before I fast walked/sort of jogged across to the other side of the street instead of going straight towards my store as usual.

Like an absolute ass I walked to my store on a street parallel to the one he was walking on, both of us headed in the direction of my store.

It is perfectly regrettable already but wait there is more. I may have walked incredibly fast the entire time while pretending to be fascinated by my phone in it’s entirety. I was looking so intently at my phone that to others it probably looked as if I was saving someone’s life, like the continuance of our world was based around my answering this very important text message with no time to look up or to the side, but all eyes glued to the screen.

So needless to say, I appeared an ever so self absorbed douche bag who thinks she is saving lives through the power of text messaging.

I think next time I’m cleaning my dishes and rummaging through my thoughts ill remember oh yes, yes indeed I am quite single.

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